Funemployment: 3 weeks in

Hello

Just checking in since it’s been a while. Three weeks have now passed since I left my job. It has given me a much needed break to allow my mind to heal.

During this time I have not planned for much, allowing myself to just do whatever I feel like. Lately it’s been reading articles and social media on my phone, plus a big dose of Netflix.

While there are some bouts of unexplained (and uncalled for) anxiety, for the most part I can feel myself getting better every day.

When I feel up to it, the next step is getting therapy again and working through issues deeply ingrained in my psyche. There are many areas to explore, such as how to disentangle myself from the urge to work hard and not let down others, all the while not saving myself until it is too late. I would also like to understand better my drives and desires and how I can link this to a new job in a way that is healthy and keeps me motivated and happy.

In the meantime I’ve started thinking about trying new things. Easy things to get into are things such as coding, painting etc.

I asked my friend today about the field of accounting. Apparently – and I certainly did not know this – there are many fields of accounting. One that seems interesting to me is management accounting. It is a field that utilises the data produced by a businesses’s input/output to analyse and strategise what decisions the business should make next.

Reading up on this led me to a thought that maybe I could learn how to help my partner in a more business-like way. E.g. could fields such as management accounting help me help him to optimise his revenue streams? We’d already started thinking about this before when I realised he was spending >50% of his time creating YouTube videos that produced very little income compared to streaming.

The reason I’m thinking about this is because helping my partner will always make me happy. There’s a certain pride I feel when I see how far he’s come and how satisfied he is with his career. Whether it’s a positive thing or not, I have always been drawn to doing things to make others happy. I can blame my parents for that. Is it so bad to want to help improve my partner’s success? Especially if, together, we form a team that allows both of us to live a fulfilling life with plenty of flexibility?

I think this is definitely something I want to explore.